Hooray! (Kinda)

Currently Listening to: The Tornado Lessons
By: Cloud Cult

Ch’yeah!!! (Cue Tiger Woods-esque fistpump)

So, yes Tiger won the U.S Open AGAIN yesterday, so this is a slight homage to him. However, I definitely did a tiger-esque epic fist pump yesterday when I got my phone call from Ben Popken, Chief Editor over at Consumerist.com, who called to say that I GOT THE INTERNSHIP! (cue the Hallelujah chorus…). I start on Monday, assuming that all of my Comcast Installations go according to plan and free of corporate shenanigans, and that I get my phone charger back sometime within the next week. My entire connection to the outside world has basically been cut off now that my cell phone is dead. I am a baby whose umbilical cord has just been severed from it’s mother and I’m not sure yet where I’m going to get my daily dose of essential nutrients.

I’m pretty excited about this internship, it was all I could do from doing an epic fist pump in the middle of the open studio surrounded by coworkers, but my overflowing enthusiasm resulted in a somewhat awkward conversation with Ben, since I really would just leave long bouts of silence as my mind raced all over the place.  He was as dazed and confused as I was I think. We’ll see how impressive my work in the Gawker Media Network becomes. Maybe I will conquer them.

Oh I will conquer. Yes I will conquer. I will conquer to the point that Gengis Kahn will shit his pants — IN HIS GRAVE.

Okay, now that I finally got that out of my system, I can move on to the meatier stuff. Savage Grace has released in theaters and I am shooting myself in the foot because I don’t know if I have the time to go see it this week and I highly doubt that it’s going to stay in theaters thru next week — you know how the indie film circuit goes. I already missed Mongol when it released and even though there’s a download online it’s harddubbed with Russian (it’s confusing enough to be reading subtitles– I don’t want to be jerked around with two audio sequences). I did, however, get a successful and acceptable (and awesome) download of In Bruges and Charlie Bartlett, and I’m quite excited about those. I apologize about not writing reviews for films lately, it’s just that they’ve all been so lackluster. Besides — I don’t really tell anyone this but I have this small little place in my dark heart for Romantic Comedies, I know, I pretend like I’m a high-and-mighty, holier-than-thou kind of person when it comes to movies. But sometimes a girl really needs to kick back and watch that pornography-for-the-female-mind bullshit that the media is feeding us today. I’m sorry, I know I will likely burn a thousand years in hell for it, but it is a habit I don’t think I can shake. But the jist of it is that I’m far to embarressed to write about THOSE films. Besides, the Great Debators, Dewey Cox, and We Own the Night hardly make up any solid writing material.

So, one little ferret ball of stress has been completely eliminated. Only to be replaced with some other bouncy beings which are constantly rotating about my head like electrons.  There are some personal issues with some specific relationships and friendships, then there’s the whole stress of moving, which has been near to impossible to completely finish with the lack of a car, and the fact that I’m still working full time. I’m angry, frequently tired, and I’ve developed an eye twitch that makes me akin to Mr. DeMartino from Daria.

I’m not kidding.

This stress may just be killing me.

I’m officially addicted, and paranoid.

Currently listening to: Sponsored by Destiny
By: Slagsmalsklubben
(oh how I love Swedish Techno beats)

I just realized that I’ve been negligent and forgot to bring my lunch this morning. I was so looking forward to that bologna and cheese sandwich and the sides of grapes and wheat thins. When you realize that you were expecting something and then it’s something completely different, kind of like when you drink orange juice but OH SHIT it’s actually milk, your entire body cringes with the shock of it and your face squishes into this completely distorted look that makes you look like you just smelled something that had been dead for at least four months, to be only slightly specific. So yep, here I am, sitting at work and realizing that I, like an idiot, left my deliciously scrumptious lunch at home. For shame.

So I’ve come to realize that I may have developed a slight addiction, maybe it’s to reading, maybe it’s to the internet, maybe it’s to the foolish belief that I am constantly expanding my mind, I don’t really know. I feel that a lot of other people out there like to stay well informed as well, but I don’t know if reading a 10 page New York Times article on shared parenting is really appropriate for a girl who is only 19 and barely making her way in the world. There’s also the media factors, I follow at least two different podcasts — Diggnation for one, iFanboy because I’m just such a comic book whore, and then the other various ones on history and classic novels. Now that I’ve realized that PBS.com has multiple full length presentations on their website I basically shat myself with excitement, if I were to have any clue as to what an orgasm actually feels like I would have sworn that I came when I found out.  Brilliant Broadcsts from Growing Up Online to Fighting Child Prostitution to exposes on childbirth injuries prevalent amongst Ethiopian Women. Cracking the Maya code?! This shit is like crack cocaine to me! I’m a kid in a metaphorical candy shop! I want it all and I’m going to be on the biggest sugar high of my life!

I feel like I’m addicted to information, that I can’t process enough facts and statistics at once, I want to be well informed of the world around me, sure The Onion is fantastic material, their written satire really can’t be beat. But I’m thriving on this real news, these real reports, The New York Times education and film sections should really just IV right into me, I don’t need food. I need this stream of information. It doesn’t help that I’m reading books like Generation Me: Why today’s young Americans are more Confident, Assertive, Entitled — and miserable than ever before,  Class Matters, and Sin No More: From Abortion to Stem Cells. Understanding Crime, Law, and Morality in America . What am I? Fucking…55? I should be off reading the lated book by Chuck Klosterman (though I have read his work) or praising the work of Chuck Palahniuk (God that last names hard to spell).

Here brings in that whole…paranoia business. I’m sitting here devouring all of this information, gorging myself on it really. I find myself reading things about the economy, the possibility of universal healthcare, jobs that pay surprisingly well, and parenting for pete’s sake. I feel like I’m 19 but I’m constantly looking to the future. Looking for the position that I think is best, planning my co-ops a good six months ahead of the game, causing myself to needlessly worry about…well…everything it seems. Planned assets, property prices, the economy, my childrens school districts, parenting methods, job choices. I mean, I could go on and on. My boyfriend frequently chides me for being so quiet when we’re walking places, the real issue is that I just don’t want him to think that I’m some worry wart freak of nature, because as we’re walking I’m considering the cost of living of where we’re walking, approximate taxes, how much of an annual salary I’d devote to a mortgage. Crazy things like that. I’m fully aware that this boy wants to marry me, but what if he stays at the same job? These crazy thoughts are running through my head all the time. Today I was picking apart the article on parents who opted for Shared Parenting. Really? Two parents with part time jobs and still having to pay for daycare? I don’t even know how that would work out for you financially, that leaves you no room for upward movement within the company — you’ve basically just stuck yourself in the same position at your job for the next 10 years. Besides, your company has to be amazing if they’re going to give you benefits and all of that other jazz. Working part time the average family is looking at an average COMBINED income that might (if they’re lucky) graze the 60,000 dollar mark. Combine that with the average home in the US costing 200K (note that that translates to more than 3 times your combined annual income) — that leaves you looking at being in a constant state of debt — with your mortgage approaching 1/2 of your income. I don’t know if  I could live with that kind of stress and pressure.

Gah! I’m thinking again. Damn me. I love McDonalds.

Feeling that time crunch.

For the past week I have been what I can only describe to be a stressball with the energy of a crazed ferret — bouncing around the walls of its cage and searching for an escape when it eventually dies of self-inflicted internal injuries and foaming at the mouth. There has been the recent acquisition of the new apartment, which, due to several epic three-hour long trips to the gleaming beacon of Ikea, has now been somewhat furnished. I’ve been spending this week running about like a crazed madwoman, calling the gas and electric company to transfer service, contacting the devils I know to be Comcast to get my (hopefully) high-speed internet connection set up in my name, rushing about to find the perfect fathers day present (which turned out to be a 1-year netflix subscription and a Roku Box), arranging for the locks to be changed, scheduling plans for the week, and most importantly worrying about my internship application to Consumerist.

Yes, that Consumerist. You know that one that is part of the almighty Gawker Media family, once home to Emily Gould and still a parent of one of my other favorite blogs to read, Gizmodo (they just have that sense of humor that Engadget lacks, and the blogging skills that would make Geekologie writers weep). You know that Consumerist that has an Alexa ranking of 5,316 and was in PC magazines list of top 100 classic websites. Anyways, all of that said, I was more than overjoyed two weeks ago when I saw their posting requesting an intern, nothing too serious, it was simply asking for someone who will basically filter through all of their gmail to find the juicy stuff for their posted stories. I, being the easily excitable person that i am, nearly shit my pants and then proceed to try and write the most witty and memorable e-mail ever while flying by the seat of my pants (after all I only have two to three paragraphs with which to impress Ben Popken).  That said, a copy of the original e-mail is getting pasted below as-is, please ignore any grammatical errors, those are because I was as excited as a fucking chipmunk when he finds out he has musical talent and his name is Alvin. My fingers trip over what my brain is trying to say to them.

“Hey Consumerist!

So I just wanted to tell you what an ideal and awesome intern I would be — I fit into all of your requirements, I suppose I’ll just go through them one by one. Because, you know, that’s the most orderly way to do things.

Requirement Numero Uno : Love The Consumerist.

Okay, so I don’t walk around wearing an “I Heart Consumerist” t-shirt butchering of the original Milton Glaser design. But you guys are on my Speed dial (yes, the Firefox add-on) and I read you with a sort of religious fanatacism. Not so fanatically religious that I’d burn myself or bomb anyone, but you get the drift. I live for your Morning Deals and your eternal bashing of everything that is Dell.

Requirement Two: Can commit 1-3 hours every other weekday, without fail.

I am on the computer at work for nine and a half waking hours of the day, then I return home and after cooking myself a splendid college meal (Ramen Noodles) and then usually turn to the internet for some form of entertainment. It’s either that or me working on my latest Vimeo Video, WordPress entry, or Portfolio update. Once my present fulltime job is over (June 25th) my freetime is bound to just exponentially increase, and 1-3 hours a day on Gmail really isn’t going to slow me down one bit.

Requirement Three: Enjoy asking strangers for followup information.

Of course not everyone is most adept at talking to strangers in social situations, myself included, if you’re asking me to do so via the internet or by phone, I’m 100% there. No Problem.

Requirement Four: Are adept at sniffing out the one good needle in a pile of haystacks.

Okay, so I’m not very adept at “sniffing” and distinguishing a tiny piece metal from a bunch of dead overgrown grass. I will however jump in that haystack from the second story of the barn, roll all around in it and either find the needle and hold it up with an epic stance, or have it get stuck somewhere in my flesh. Either way I found it and I found it with enthusiasm!

Requirement Five: Are a Gmail master.

G-mail master?! More like G-mail guru. Paris Hilton totally considered to hire me to walk next to her so she could appear more “web savvy”. I have multiple accounts, forwarding galore and I have the keyboard shortcuts down pat. Did I mention that I also read through the entire Lifehacker article when it released?

Requirement Six: Live for Labeling

I don’t have a secret stash of label machines laying about (I used to have one on a keychain somewhere) but I did label all THREE of my drawers at work “Pirate Hats”, “Secret Stash” and “Self Defense” respectively. No, there is no alcohol sitting in my secret stash drawer and YES Self-Defense is full of plastic knives from the kitchen.

Requirement Six: Rock Gmail macros

I’m totally rockin’ the Firefox extention for that — I’m a big fan of Quicksilver and this totally saves me time.

So, basically. I’m a hard worker, incredibly enthusiastic, a college student, and a fan of your site. If you wanted something a little more serious I can send that your way. I have a list of references who attest to my completely professional demeanor in the workplace. I only figured that since you guys were after all a part of the Gawker Network — you’d appreciate my fine writing.

Thank you for the opportunity,
Rachel Mercer”

Contact information was redacted

So that was that, I sent that e-mail and a couple of follow-ups. I started being paranoid of being “that annoying overreaching girl” and stopped sending anything at all. I basically sat at my desk at work 10 hours a day incessantly checking my e-mail. The following week I receive a response e-mail from their weekend editor, Carey, who basically says that they’re now reviewing applications. Great, they received my email and now I am crossing my fingers so hard they might break because I really want this job.

One week later…
SUCCESS! Ben Popken, the editor of the site, e-mailed me back!

from Ben Popken [redacted] to [redacted] date Mon, Jun 9, 2008 at 6:58 PM subject re: Internship. I want it. mailed-by consumerist.com

)

Hi Rachel,

Thanks for your (enthusiastic!) application. I’d like to interview you for the position. Do you have some time to talk over the phone this week?

Hallelujah! It was a complete surprise, I had just worked my third16 hour day in the span of a  week and I was totally bushed, it was 10:30 at night, and I was frantically calling my best friend to tell him and bounce response ideas off of (we kind of have a bet going on as to whether or not I’m going to get the job, his bet is that I will, my bet is against me, after all I’m probably competing with 250+ applicants, all of whom have amazing blogs of their own, he says that I’m going to get it — but has no real argument as to why.) Anyways, I ended up very quickly writing a general response read it aloud to my friend asking if it was funny but not, you know, that “I’m trying hard to be funny” funny, and sent that e-mail through the intertubes.

from Rachel M <redacted> to Ben Popken <redacted> date Mon, Jun 9, 2008 at 10:25 PM subject Re: Internship. I want it. mailed-by gmail.com

Hi Ben!

(that exclamation point indicates the ridiculous amounts of enthusiasm with which I am presently writing this e-mail.)

I am still working my full time job/internship/indentured servantry but I (hopefully) don’t have any late nights ahead of me this week. I am free on Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday after 5:30 pm or if you’d rather schedule something during normal business hours I can actually take a lunch break and talk to you sometime in that ambiguous three hour period when people actually take lunch.

Looking forward to speaking with you,

Rachel Mercer

Huzzah! It was sent. There it was, he had e-mailed me at 7pm on a Monday, I responded within 4 hours, I figured I was solid. Now it’s nearing the end of Wednesday and I’m wringing my hands again, I swear I should learn to knit or something constructive so I don’t end up biting my nails to an oblivion. At least work requires me to use both of my hands because I’m using all the shortcuts ever needed in InDesign/Photoshop/Illustrator and the mouse to clickity click everything in sight. Then there are the times when I’m writing these posts, which are borderline ridiculous. Anyways, I finally got approval from Chris to go ahead and call the guy, we’ll see how it goes, I’m probably just going to do the follow-up email, because I don’t want to appear to be a stalker.

In the meantime, I realized that when I’m walking to work, I’m incredibly frustrated that I can’t blog while I do it, or at least have a rapid transfer device to transfer the words in my head somehow to paper or and editable format (wow, that was almost edible…that’d be weird. TOAST …brain… transfers…words on TOAST!…anyways…). I find myself having a lot of thoughts that I really want to write about and I never really get a chance to. I also kind of see different film shots in different places, that very strangely replay in my head. Sometimes I enjoy splicing them together and then adding a soundtrack or Michael Bay-esque special effects, but that’s only when I’m sleeping.

One of my favorite scenes is in the mornings when I am walking from Downtown Crossing towards South Station when I am walking against the flow of a lot of the foot traffic.  I sometime like to walk in the middle and watch the people break apart and walk around me, looking at all of their faces. Then I find myself walking across the bridge with about 15 different thoughts that I really need to have written down.

I came across some really interesting broadcasts which I recently discovered (by that I mean read about on consumerist) from PBS.com, one of the ones that I readily grasped and listened to while I was working was their Frontline piece on Universal Healthcare, which went to 5 different successful Capitalist countries and compared their national healthcare methods to ours. It was really interesting, and I found it incredibly enjoyable and informative — you can find it here. It’s a very large topic in the upcoming presidential elections, so I feel like it’s good to be well informed. I also spoke about this last week with Philippe who is from France, and felt like I didn’t really know what I was talking about.

The other one that I’m listening / watching to presently is Growing up online. It’s really quite interesting considering that I was one of those kids, heck I am one of those kids. You know that whole thing, blogging and having a myspace page, facebook, etc. I was laughing my ass off because to kick off the show they were playing hardcore music and showed some nerds having a LAN party in their basement playing Counterstrike. I’ll have more commentary on this later … probably in conjunction with my completion of reading Generation Me.

This may be an awesome summer…for movies.

Currently Listening to: The Truth about Cats and Dogs (is that they die)
By: Pony Up

So I went and saw the epic-ness that was Ironman, possibly (and this is totally backed up by the Totally Rad Show) the best comic book movie to have been made to date. I’m even more pleased simply because it’s done by Marvel, and as we all know I am a huge Marvel fangirl. That smash into the summer made me realize: this is going to be a completely awesome summer for movies.

Last night I managed to drag my partner to the movie theater, which even though he is a fan of the medium, doesn’t necessarily frequent the actual theater. It may be directly related to the fact that he’s a germaphobe or maybe he just got touched the wrong way once in middle school by the fat lady dropping popcorn everywhere and overflowing from her seat and into his. Who knows really, but it must have been traumatizing. However, I managed to get him to the theater where we saw the fantastically filmed Son of Rambow, which is a feel good story for anyone who watches — you find little quirky actions throughout the entire film that you find completely heartwarming, charming and simultaneously hilarious. The two young boys who are the main characters could easily work their way into anyones heart. Especially when they’re all dolled up in military dress and use yellow crayons as bullet replacements.

The hilarity is not entirely dolloped throughout the entire film — this shit takes you on an emotional rollercoaster ride comparable to that experienced by women in the birthing process. There’s tension, tearjerking moments, as well as extreme euphoria — you follow these boys as they film their what can only be described as an EPIC tribute/sequel/idontreallyknow to First Blood. This film is set right in the peak of the 80’s, when Boy George was king, and this leads us to our quasiantihero the Frenchmen that looks like a heroin addicted Rufio who sports ridiculously tight pants, facial hair that can only be described as a mexi-stache, and smokes incessantly. Somehow this French douchebag gathers a following of equally loser British Schoolboys who worship his every move and girls line up to make out with him when he looks like a lost fish, the kind that thinks it’s a bird. Yeah, you’re looking at that picture with me right now and totally agreeing with me. That’s right. He’s a douche. But a necessary character that completely adds to the hilarity.

Something else that totally made this movie worthwhile, the McDreamy older brother played by Ed Westwick, whom I adore because he’s also in Children of Men. He plays the pushy, yuppie older brother of the ever-in-trouble Lee Carter and he provides deeper insight into the familial relations, and who in the end kind of helps to save the day.

Overall I thought the film was very good, thoroughly enjoyable, and a good laugh. Now I believe that when I am a parent and carrying about a video camera instead of those really lame home movies I’m totally going to film my children going on safari through what can only be described as the overgrown weeds polluting my backyard. We’re going to be awesome, film great music videos together, and it’s all going to be epic. Watch out world, my kids and I are going to be awesome.

Now for some trailers that I’ve spotted this week that I’m incredibly excited about.

American Teen [2008] Release Date: July 25th

This premiered at the SXSW film festival in Austin after a fantastic breakout at the Sundance Film Festival where Nanette Burstein received the award for Best Director of a Documentary. The trailer looks like the typical thing that you’d see from MTV, but this isn’t your Laguna Beach — there’s no light screens and setups there’s certainly no Douchebag Heidi Montag or Spencer Pratt to worry  about. Plus there’s actual high school stereotypes here! You know, the jock that’s only chances of college are based on his skills in the court. and somehow passed all his classes even though his IQ was 75. The nerd who is obsessed with WoW, DnD and can’t for the life of him strip his face of acne. The popular girl (75% of my high school with ovaries was this) — you know the princess who gets everything, her parents have money, and when she eventually goes to college she is going to join a sorority so she can relive the entire experience. Will eventually be in the PTA. The Artsy Girl (hey, it’s me!), you know the generally awesome non-chalant chick who is looking to get the hell out of that small town and do great things! Then there’s the hot jock who is putting everything on the line to date her. I’m excited, reliving high school all over again in a less traumatizing and bible-thumping experience should be good. A lot of people have expressed interest in the characters, they’re believable and it’s great because we’ve all been there. There’s a lot of potential for this. Also, the turning of the teens into a modern day Breakfast Club is sheer brilliance.

Defiance [2008] Release Date: December 26, 2008

Daniel Craig is just so damn ballsy him and his three brothers are going to take on – guess what – THE ENTIRE GERMAN ARMY. The hunky Bond-man stars as Tuvia Bielski in the true WWII story of three Jewish brothers who hid in the Belorussian forests and built a community of partisan fighters, saving over 1,200 Jews by war’s end. When I watched this trailer my skin prickled, I am a  huge fan of WWII movies, especially those that are based on true stories (Sophie Scholl for one). I firmly believe that the generation that lived through World War II definitely deserve their title of “The Greatest Generation”, and actions/events such as that certainly affirm that. Needless to say that the direction behind this is fantastic, Edward Zwick also directed such stellar and moving films as Glory, Blood Diamond, and the Last Samurai. Seriously, watch the trailer for this, and you will be as excited as I am.

City of Ember [2008] Release Date: October 10, 2008

Okay, so you guys may not be as lame as me because I was reading those fantastic teen fiction books late into my high school career. This book was one of my favorites, it has an incredibly original idea.  Ember is a completely self-contained, self-maintained city. All food and supplies come from giant storerooms under the city and a handful of greenhouses — this city we know only had the supplies to last it for 220 years. Of course, fast forward to 241, and there we meet our young heroes, who upon further exploration within the city believe that they have found a way out. A very interesting book upon my first read — it’s kind of like a basic introduction to dystopian literature for those tweens who want to expand their literary horizons. I’m not sure quite yet how I feel about this movie — mostly because it’s between the fact that Bill Murray is a main character but I am expecting an excellent performance froman older Saoirse Ronan, whose breakthrough performance in Atonement was stellar. The steampunk feel to the entire setting is incredibly fitting, and I have hope.

Hallam Foe (Mr. Foe) [2007] Release Date: August 31st, 2008 (US)

I’m excited for this film, mostly because Jamie Bell who plays Mr. Foe is making his first acting debut since Billy Elliot, and that movie my friends has been one of my favorites alongside Snatch since the 8th grade. Basically about a young guy who doesn’t really know what’s going on in his life — his mother recently passed away and he exhibits an outright loathing for his young and beautiful stepmother, whom he believes has killed her. However, we later see that this is because of conflicting emotions of attraction and dislike for her. This move has a lot of potential, and has received rave reviews. I’m kind of excited.

This week:

In addition to my downloading of Prince Caspian and The Other Boleyn Girl, I am also planning on Downloading the Last Mistress (French) and Mongol (Mongolian language, Russian Film), which are set to be released in the US later this year but have received high acclaim overseas. I have found a release on TPB and plan on watching them over the weekend. Expect reviews sometime next week.

Will write more soon, probably about comics tomorrow.